Motivation for the Caregiver….Quote #14

“People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Maya Angelou

30 thoughts on “Motivation for the Caregiver….Quote #14

  1. This is true, even with those who are severely memory deficient and couldn’t pass a dementia test if you bribed them. I knew a lady like this in the nursing home. She remembered very little about her past. The little she told me I admit I did not comprehend, but the telling of it pleased her, and brought a smile to her face. This lady, age 60, never forgot where my room was or which half of the room was mine. She would come and visit and babble, as in talking without using discernible words, yet smiling all the while because she knew I loved her. She never forgot that I loved her. If I mentioned that “God loves you”, she would cry. The CNAs treated her harshly, jerking her around physically, and yelling at her as though this would encourage cooperation. It encouraged anger and frustration on this lady’s part. She never forgot the way I treated her. She loved me back.

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    1. I’m a huge believer in “just be kind”!! Sometimes people need kindness and compassion, no judgement. Lending an ear can make the world of difference. Let people know they’re not alone in their struggles. It’s so good to hear from you! How are you!?

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  2. You don’t want to know. Rose Blossom was wonderful until we got our latest caregiver, who is not only moody , but a bully to me and another lady. Owner, who I attempted to speak with about it, dismissed it. Jo, owner’s golden girl, grew extremely angry with me for what she saw as complaining about caregiver. Jo complains about anything. She has free reign of the place. Anyway, Jo called a meeting with owner, expelled some lies about me that she had created, and owner gave permission for 911 to be rung up and tote me to psychiatric hospital if I do this again. Naturally, I feel very uncomfortable here now, and very unsafe. No one to talk to.

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  3. My primary doctor said it’s not unusual for small places like this to bully a resident. She was very concerned. She checked me thoroughly, and decided the fault lay on their side. She said if they bully or abuse me in any way to call her! I also have Ombudsmen and a caseworker with Legacy Link, the people who employ the Medicaid program that is paying for this venture

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  4. Until this caregiver came, Life here was good. As of now, the servings at our meals are getting smaller and smaller. No desserts, although they are listed on the menu. I went for her this morning at 6:00 am because my window was letting rain in again. Last time it got on my bed and soaked the ends of my personal blankets. The floor. Some furniture. It was a mess. Caregiver said she couldn’t come because she had just got up and wasn’t working yet. I came back and fixed it myself with 2 big black trash bags I had. I am really tired of this. She likes to get angry and tell us to wait , then list all the things she has to do. Angrily. I don’t respond to her anymore. My courtesy doesn’t extend that far. Pray for me, and I plan to call Ombudsmen about her tomorrow.

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    1. Why is your window letting in rain!? Is it broken or just left open? I’m glad you were able to resolve the leak yourself! However, it isn’t your responsibility. I wish you could find a satisfactory living situation. One that provides good care and comfort. It’s astonishing that good facilities are so scarce! You’re in my thoughts!

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      1. The window is cracked and has been for a year. It never let in rain ☔️ until I got here. Let me reword that! The crack in the window was never so defined as to allow rain to escape into the building until the day that my poor blankets got wet. And no, the window isn’t my responsibility, but I like my blankets, and I don’t like rain being allowed in on them. I reported caregiver’s total reluctance to work on the window, along with other problems, like starving us. Nursing homes and personal care homes are lightly watched after by the state, and the state likes to be bribed, at least those who came to Tattnall did. State came and went and the abuse of residents went right on as though nothing had happened. Look on your computer and you’ll find this situation all over the country. Nursing home abuse is rampant, and the physical abusers can go right out to another nursing home and get another job, no sweat. They are not arrested. Gotta get ready for breakfast. I love you. 💕❤️😘

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      2. It hurts me to know such hardships are occurring in care facilities. We can correlate this with the increase of people aging at home. I’m sorry you’re on the receiving end! Enjoy breakfast! Great hearing from you!

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      3. It’s my opinion that disrespect for life at one level (unborn babies) leads to disrespect for life at another level (older people who happen to be sickly and poor). Now that disrespect is being extended to unborn babies with birth defects, as well as living, older people with birth defects. Of course, this intolerance for the burden of showing compassion is thrown off on the elderly with dementia and Alzheimer’s. One lady with dementia, located in the Netherlands, was heard to say that she wished she might die. We have all said that at sometime in our lives. Her doctor there had her sign a voluntary suicide paper ( if you call it ‘voluntary’ and a ‘paper’ it’s not really so bad. It’s really compassion! For the hospital). The woman changed her mind and compassionate doctor had her family hold her down for the suicide shot. Family really didn’t want her. Doctor is now being called up for his decision and I hope family is feeling all kinds of guilty. You see how one kind of disrespect for life leads to another. Several states are fighting abortion tooth and nail. Trump has defunded Planned Parenthood. My daughter, who is a Christian, no longer pays for abortions. The country is slowly coming to rights. I hope I didn’t bore you, but these things are very close to my heart, and I pray about them constantly. God is good. He hears the prayers of all believers who want to see our country saved from these things.

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      4. You’re never a bore!! I enjoy your insight and opinions. You’re very well-versed in today’s societal problems. Have you tried starting a round-table discussion at your living facility? Maybe get others involved and discuss our nation’s future?

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      5. I am the only one here who is interested enough in our country to think about it so much. The others watch tv and talk about other things. At the nursing home it was the same way. Even the staff stayed away from politics and those who didn’t were Democrats and never-Trumpers! Oh well! I don’t discuss politics to be agreed with, but I don’t care for long, finger waving lectures either. (Sigh) On my Facebook page, we hear a variety of opinions and we pray for the president. If people become argumentative, I take them off. I have found 2 or 3 Christians that I have barred from my site for talking ugly about Trump. Not giving different opinions, talking ugly.

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      6. That’s a relief to hear! I would ask some in South Georgia if they liked Trump, and they would reply, “Yes, BUT…” and an avalanche of angry protests against his speech, attitude, etc. follow Etc. I would venture, “Then, you don’t like him? “ and get a quick “Oh yes, BUT”. I finally stopped asking. Mainly because they got going and didn’t stop. These people would go on and on and on. Interruption was futile. They were talking to themselves, not me. Oh well. Live and learn. I miss my sister. When I was with her a someone did that, she would grin at me and ask them the most inane questions, which they really didn’t hear, but tried to answer anyway. We would have a fine time giggling about that when we got home.

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      7. Hahaha! I know exactly what you mean with, “Yes, BUT…”!!! I’ve heard that same phrase many, many times! Your sister sounds like a wonderful person. Siblings can be so much fun. I enjoy the shared inside jokes and giggles!!

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      8. I have found, truly, that most people are concerned about our country. Some are not talented at expressing that concern, but it’s a love of country all the same. Have you listened to Tulsi Gabbard? I wish she would win the Democratic nomination for president. The debates between Trump and Gabbard would be very interesting and inspiring.

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  5. Caregiver changed the mealtimes and just didn’t bother to tell us. She never speaks anymore at meals. Actually, she never bothers to explain herself. I am not handling this situation very well. I feel I am in a no-win situation.

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      1. None that I know of. We had the other two meals at the regular times, and supper with dessert 🍨, since I had told the visiting nurse about the shrinking meals. I don’t know what today will bring. I called the Ombudsman yesterday about Jo’s constant comments to me, and how they are designed as left-handed compliments. I never speak to Jo. It would be disastrous to do so. She doesn’t care about me, she just wants to win. Breakfast 🍳

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      2. Usually tasty, and since I reported the meals to the nurse, enough to fill us up, with a good dessert. Caregiver rarely gives a reason for anything, rarely explains herself. Communication is not her strong point. She is not a people person. I have also reported her moods. Extreme moods. Now if I can get Jo off of my back. She yelled at me so loud at supper last night that I jumped! I didn’t speak, however, when I got back to my room I threw a fit about her. I told the nurse and the Ombudsmen about Jo. Hopefully something will be done to quiet her down soon.

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  6. We had breakfast at the regular time! I guess the new schedule is off for now. To answer your question about a reason? No one knows. Certainly not me. About Jo, she talks to me, and when I don’t reply she makes an ugly comment. I talked to the Ombudsmen about this also. Talking to you about these things has really lightened my load. I really appreciate your interest and I apologize for repeating things. Knowing you care makes a huge difference. Thanks

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    1. I’m glad our conversations help relieve a little stress!! Don’t apologize! If you repeat, I have an opportunity to reflect on key points in our conversations! I’m sometimes empathetic to a fault! Lol I do enjoy our quick exchanges!

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  7. I enjoy keeping up with the presidential debates because I feel they’re so important. They really reveal the character of the candidates, and the knowledge they have of the office they seek- in terms of practical skills but also in terms of heart skills. The debates show where the candidates’ hearts are toward American citizens, which is the most important skill any candidate can have. I don’t know how you feel about Trump, but he speaks my heart, and the concerns of a great many others. He speaks these concerns in easy, Everyman’s language. He makes himself easily and comfortably understood. Yet he is a genius. If Trump were to debate Tulsi Gabbard, she is a lady, and Trump is a gentleman. It would be the first decent debate that actually followed the rules of a debate in years!

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